I dont want to be here anymore I feel broken both physically and mentally, I just want it to be over somehow
Joe,
I feel your pain. You shared in anothe post earlier that you needed some help discerning a direction...now you want that anguish to be over.
I'm not going to sermonize to you. You know scripture. You know about Job.
Right now all that matters is that you hurt and you want the pain to stop..emotional, physical, spiritual..whatever the cause, you want the anguish and questions to end...
I get that.
Been there all too often. I've heard it here and I've seen many others crash and cry as well.
It is part of the human experience. We want to believe, but we have doubts. We've been conditioned in our society to have "instant" pudding, grits, and medical cures. We don't like pain.
Feeling "broken both physically and mentally" can wear us out. Truth is that "feelings" are real indicators of our human condition.
As bad as you feel, if you saw a child trapped in an over-turned burning vehicle, you're physical pain would stop as your found inner strength to rip and tear at doors or windows to save that child.
Same is true if you were threatened with immenent danger...you'd try to survive.
God is often quiet in these times, I don't know why...but scripture tells us it is to see if we really have enough FAITH to persevere for what God has planned for us next.
it's ok when we don't. He loves us with a passion beyond human comprehension. He will love us where we are and if we but hang on just a while longer, He will bring us through our trials.
I've learned that I might not like what God wants for me...and often I do NOT. Sometimes it outright SUCKS...but it is His Bidding and I will go along. Sometimes I grumble and grouse. Good thing He is omniscient and all loving, huh?
Our is not to set the time n or the place as to when our work is done. That is His call.
Fall down. Ask for strength... One I like is "Lord, I do believe in you, but help me with my dis-belief".
Keep the Son in your eyes. We're here for you and praying alongside you every step!
Nighthawk,
I'm not sure where you are right now, but I can almost feel your pain as I read your message. You're in my prayers. May God bless you and give you some reprieve from the pain, as well as assurance that you are indeed where He wants you go be.
-Vig
joe my heart breaks for you. we don't know your situation but we do care. joe 5 years ago my wife said she didn't want to be married anymore, my whole world was pulled out from under me. we have two young girls, i was 43 when we had our youngest, were teaching sunday school, had good jobs,new house, and were blessed far more than we deserved. the day we were to sign the papers i went to church to pray for three hours, i cried and prayed GOD would intervene, that he would change her heart, i know he spoke to her but she had here own free will, he will not go around her free will. i honestly believed if i asked he would answer my prayer. her free will prevented him. i told this to say this, even though i was mad at him, i loved him and i know he loved me, he hurt with me, and never left my side. i truely believed i would never smile again. he is so faithfull to take a bad situation aand make it good. i am now married to a wonderfull christian woman, she loves GOD, loves my children, and we love her. funny but my exwife loves her to. like doc said, just hold on a little longer. not for what he can do but what he will do. pm me if you need to talk or would like my phone number to talk. GOD will be there and we will be by your side. don't give up. :pray:
Prayers from Georgia that our LORD will show you the path to take in your Life.
In HIS service
Dave
Prayers for a clear path for you and yours...
..
Wow.
Stunned. Only ever saw this once on here and the Lord interceded.
Pain and guilt can be a terrible task master, but scripture speaks to taking one's own life.
There is much on my heart, but if one is determined to take the easy way out, there is little that God nor man can do to prevent it.
Prayers for the Lord to bring intercession by way of another mortal to slap you silly before it's too late!
Lord in your Mercy...
As someone who has been through this with another, think of those who love you. Don't put them through this nightmare. Your heavenly father can lead you out of this situation. Give him a chance. Don't just give up. Seek help and you shall find many with open arms. :pray:
I hope you rethink what you are saying and going to do. Life can be good even with all the bad things that happen to each of us. I pray that you hold your ground and stand tall and defeat the demon that has you surrendering. Prayes sent
joe, pm or email me your phone number.
does anyone have joe's address/phone number???
Did anybody ever get a hold of Joe? Sent him an email, but have not received a response.
I pray Joe finds the courage to be strong and fight through what is troubling in his life and that God shows him the way.....
Joe in your state at this moment you may not think you have anything to live for, but that is so not true. God puts everyone on this Earth for a reason and I'm sure you are a blessing to so many around you, and to this trad community everyone on here has something to offer and you are no different.
God has a plan for you Joe, and ending your life is not in it....... Be strong and take gods hand and let HIM show you the way to a happy life....
God Bless you Joe.....
Guys we need to come together and lift Joe up in our prayers, because we have all had times in our life that we all have thought about giving up......
Thought maybe if someone knew the town he lived in the police could find him...but alas, we may never know. :(
Prayers continue...
Joe,
Send me your number.
My number is 512-567-3329.
I have been in a really dark time too. I seriously thought about what you are thinking.
Let me help! I will not judge! I will listen!
Matt
I looked him up by name on people finder and found a host of Joe Doyle's in Indiana. I continue to pray for him and that the Lord stepped in. We may never know how this worked out.
I tried the same thing with no luck. It says on his profile that he is a utility worker. Maybe there is a way to contact the utility companies to try and find him.
joe i asking you please stop and think individually all the people you are going to impact. if you read my post you know i've been through,and felt the same way. joe i don't believe anyone has ever loved a woman as much as i did my exwife. i'm ashamed to say it, but if someone had of asked me who i loved the most, her or GOD i couldn't have answered. my love for GOD, my girls and family is the only thing that kept me from taking my life. i knew i could never ask for forgiveness, i couldn't hold my girls, kiss them good night, or have them say i love you daddy. it's making me cry now, thinking about never seeing the people i love again. don't give up joe, GOD LOVES YOU and will bring you through this. i know your hurting. i love you brother, and asking you to give GOD more time. don't let her or satan win. i loved my exwife more than life itself, but now i realize no woman is worth hurting yourself or the people that love you. with GODS help and you giving him time, there's always a chance he will change her mind. if you take your life, it's over, no second chance. it's very hard to tell you this, but i didn't listen to people, they said don't call her, let her have time to think. brother you can drive her futher away, listen to someone who did. GOD forgive me, but dammnit joe, don't you give up, you keep fighting, don't let satan win, if you do you will lose everything. :pray:
Joe, we are praying for you brother. Let us know your fighting the fight. Stand strong. We are here for you. When one door shuts another will always open. Ask God for his help. He is there for you and will listen to your call. God bless.
nighthawk, please read pslams 116: 1-7 he will be there for you, there is nothing we can phyisically do, except pray for you. i will diligently continue to pray for you, my heart truly goes out to you, but GOD is who you need the most. we will continue to pray and be in agreement with GOD, i hope you join us.
Lord you know the state of this affair and we don't. I thank you for all the people on here who would open their hearts to this fellow who has lost sight of who he can trust. Once again the evil one is hard at work to take what ever he can to destroy ones life. Joe needs you to restrain this evil and we do too. You are the only one that can. Lord if Joe is still alive please cover him with your protection and the peace that surpasses all understanding. Please hear our prayers as we stand in the gap on behalf of this brother who has lost his way. It is in you name that we call out and in your strength that we are able to stand on your word this day and every day. Thank you Lord and Amen...........Dusty
Joe,
If you've survived that moment of utter hopelessness and come back to read, understand this: There are many here who have hit rock bottom at a time in life. As your follow this forum daily, you'll see how many of us have spent many years outside the will of God and have found redemeption and redirection. Darn few of us came by our salvation easily... The willfulness of man leads many astray.
Know there is no shame in where you've been. We each handle our personal hell differently.
Our prayers have been for God to provide some way to prevent that ultimate choice of taking your life.
Ultimately, you own the choice! You own the feelings that led you to that decision. You do NOT own feeling desparate, forlorn, worthless and devastated beyond ability to cope. Each of us are sinners beyond belief and have at one or many times in life been led to the brink of hell's gates!
It takes tremendous faith to even believe that an omniscient God could ever love one so flawed, broken and sinful as myself. There are no earthly role models for us to compare to or get a glimpse of Love that would send an only Son to die on a cross, the most dispicable and painful death I can imagine.
Where you are was no sin greater or lesser than any others who come here. Forgiveness is free and simply there for the asking.
Emotions are the devil's playground and the Liar sucked you in.
If you've made it through, and would like, people have given out their phone #'s, there are personal emails or PM's if it is too hard to come back here to post and let us know you're ok.
We all are learning from this: We are powerless in an evil world, but our God is not. Regardless of your choice and if you've followed through, you've taught me it's ok to pray like a banshee, without ever knowing outcomes. It's ok to try everything I could to find some way to reach you. And, it's ok that I'm impotent to really make a difference.
That is the reality, I am but Dust, and He alone is soverign. Prayers continue although we may never know your fate... know that you are welcome here without retribution or rancor. I don't agree with suicide but I understand the motivations deeply and my heart goes out.
Email, PM, whatever if you should feel a desire to reach out to any who post here to share your heart and sit and pray with you...and rejoice that you are with us.
If not, then I ask God's mercy on you and your fateful choice.
Your brother in Christ.
Well said "Doc Nock". God Bless you and yours. :pray:
Amen!!!
Well said Doc..your words are awesome...
Joe, Continued prayers from here.....
Wellsaid Doc.
Has anyone heard or found out anything about nighthawk? Prayers continue to go out for him
I just went back thru Joes recent posts and found a reference to the bow swap on the bowyers forum. Longbowhuntr sent him a bow in July I think. I bet he would have an address.
I think I found the right Joe Doyle,Trafalgar, Indiana. I tried a couple of numbers but they're not in service. Just keep praying! If anybody has heard anything let us know.
Joe,
We are trying to find you. Help us out and call me 512-567-3329.
We care! We will help you!
Matt
Swampy,
Did you write to that Longbowhuntr? I put in that handle and got 4 different possibles. If you found it, might you email or pm that chap and direct to this thread?
If you have the reference handy in your history file? Or send it to me and I'll do it! At work and not enough time to do all the research.
I made it through, after I took the bottle of pills I texted my pastor, and he got hold of the police ,who found me. My heart broke and I didn't see any hope or light in my life. I do now, I'm on antidepresants, which make it easier to not get caught up in negative thoughts
I don't recomend to anyone, to do what I did; "TALK "to someone before it gets that bad...I wish I had of, but I'm glad ,I'm here to be able to work on my future, either with or without, my wife as I have children that count on me, even though they are older 21 and 20 they still need their dad and THANK YOU EVERYONE that tried stop help me, I just broke and couldn't see any future or at least none I wanted to be a part of. Like I said I texted my pastor who's also my friend to say goodbye . He got ahold of the police, who found me ,and got me to the er, then off to crisis couinseling in the hospital. I got out today, my wife hasn't left for wyoming yet even though I can't go home. I know she was at the hospital er, my daughter also but haven't seen or talked to them since. I have a long road to travel and I'm asking for all the prayers I can get as I need each and everyone. I'm sorry I broke but I did, my heart did. I don't know what else to say but Thanks :dunno:
It is such a wonderfull day to see you posting. Prayers do work, and keep up the faith, we are with you.
AMEN!!!
Thank The Lord, Nighthawk!
Praise God for answering our prayers. Recovery will not be easy my friend. Just take it one step at a time. Always remember, there are those of us who have been there and care. When one door closes, another one will open. Take advantage of the oportunity God has presented you. God bless you and yours. :pray:
PRAISE the Lord. You will get thru this time in your life with the help of your Father. He is not finished with you in this life. If He had been you would not still be here. So if for no other reason then that you need to get yourself pulled up and sitting upright in the saddle and looking forward to see where our Lord needs you to work. We would not be complete without you here in this life. As far as something to say your not required to say anything to us here. As Doc says all the time "KEEP THE SON IN YOUR EYES". It's all about our FOCUS.
Forever
Observing
Christ's
Unselfish
Sacrifice
God bless and you will be hearing from us in the future........Dusty
Oh, Dear Lord...
What a tremendous end to a lousy week to come and read this Joe.
If you think you lack courage, let me tell you that isn't true...you came back here among us and shared. Many men would be too cowardly to do that.
God bless you for that one last reach out to your pastor.
Read and re-read all the great thoughts and prayers of love shared here over these past days by so many believers who have also shared difficult times, destructive times and devastating times in their/our/my lives.
nobody gets outa here unscathed! The devil has his dance with all of us time to time... you've now done your time. Only way is UP.
Keep coming here and keep sharing. There is a lot of power among these people of faith and you will deserve and draw on and from it!
Thank you Jesus!
Joe...Keep the Son in your eyes!
Joe -
I've been following this thread for days. Not posting, but praying for you. Others are much more eloquent than I. But my prayers for you were sincere. God is good and has answered all those that have humbled themselves, got down on their knees and prayed for you. Joe, you have an extended family here that cares very deeply for you and yours. We are relieved that you are still with us and on the road back to stability. Be strong in your faith, gentle with your kids and keep you heart full of praise for the One that will see you through. My God Bless you and yours and make your road to recovery smooth and straight. We love ya' man!
Danny
Joe. I'm so glad to see your latest post. Even though we never met, I consider you a friend. I don't have enough friends. May God carry you through this. I could say that I know how you feel, but I don't. Prayers sent for you. More peaple need you than you think.
PTL! Be sure you pursue and stick with getting godly counsel. And keep your knees on the ground, eyes to the sky and nose in The Book. Enjoy life and get out and shoot your bow!
Priase the lord, his hand was upon you. your pastor was a blessing from GOD, the holy sprirt spoke to him and you. GOD just works in amazing ways, you text your pastor, and he answered it just in time, coincidence? no!!! there are just so many things that could have caused him not to get the text. i pray you realize GOD was with you all the time, and you will thank him, and look to him always. we are so glad to see you back on here, we will never judge you, we have seen our own trials, GODS grace,love and mercy and he has helped us overcome. GLORY TO GOD. keep giving us updates, and if you have our ph. number call when you need someone to talk to. call me anytime day or night. joe i've been through the same thing, i'll be honest, it will take some time, but GOD will bring you through, you will have peace and happiness again. we love you brother, take care of yourself there are a lot of people that love you and need you. :clapper:
Amen to much good council here. So glad you're here!
NightHawk,
I'm glad you're still with us! You've got a lot of people praying for you... you can't beat that. There are a lot of God fearing people who care for you and are in prayer right now for you. Hang in there.
Vig
Thanks be to God!
More prayers sent for NightHawk - for enduring and overcoming his challenges! Amen.
Sincerely in Christ, David Camp
Nighthawk, I am new to this forum, but I just wanted to say that I am happy that you are still here. I don't know you, and you don't know me, but that matters not, I am thankful that you are alive.
If you don't mind, email me at yard1man@charter.net I would like to speak to you privately. Thanks
Keep it up. You can do it.
Hadn't been on the puter for a few days. This was the first place I went. Thanks, Joe, for posting! Praise the Lord!
Im really glad you made it, NighHawk. If and when God calls you home, he will not need your help. lol
I wish you the best, brother. God Bless.
Gilbert
Praying for your progress in the positive direction. Fight a good fight and think about the story about Job. Thats not a fairy tale, it's a testimony of faith.
Joe,
We are here for you. You have been in our thoughts and prayers. My number is 512-567-3329
Matt
Joe,
I didn't post earlier because I didn't know what to say... It's usually the case on this particular forum for me. I just pray...
My heart sank until I saw that you've returned, and all I can say is that I am deeply grateful you were found. There was a saint with my name that lived long, long ago: Juan de la Cruz. He wrote a book called "Dark Night of the Soul" and his words regarding God's love saved this Juan de la Cruz from his own dark night. Read it.
You will persevere, you will come out stronger, THIS TOO SHALL PASS!
I know how you feel. I've been there and am struggling right now myself. But I can't give up or give in. God has something for me to do. It is my job to seek out His plans for my life from this time forward. God has been there with me through a lot of tough times and I know he is there now. Sometimes I just don't feel it, but I don't trust my feelings. Seek out His word.
I'll be praying for you. I know your pain! It is real, but it is just for a short time. Things will change for the better, but it is just hard to see that from where you are right now.
G
My prayers go out to you! Call the guys on this thread! We care and are here for you regardless of where you are. You are not alone.
My Prayers for you strength and courage and peace in this troubling time!
Keeping the faith!
Magnus
update: My wife has moved to wyoming from Indiana. I can't contact or talk to her because she asked for a protective order, why I'm not sure as I never threatened her. I internalized everything and blamed myself not anyone else. We had the preliminary hearing and on her way back to wyoming she totaled the kia sorento in Kansas City. Thank God no one was hurt but now her attorney is contesting the divorce? That seems strange to me because she is the one that filed, I think they must have not gotten what they thought they were going to get and they're contesting the hearing?? I dont know, I'm just speculating.
I also think she has aligned herself to recieve curses instead of blessings, because she is definately outside of Gods will.I pray daily for her and am keeping the door open for whenever she wants to come home
Prayed for you and your wife. With God all things are possible, so hang in there, and HANG ON to Him.
joe first of all i'm happy to see your still posting, and that there are people here continuing to pray and reach out to you. for those of us that have been in your situation, we do understand. you are so right, she is not doing GODS will, he says he hates divorce, that is a very severe feeling from our creater and lord. it's pure selfish to turn on GOD, a family or spouse. they simply don't care about all the heart ache they cause the people that love them. i loved my ex more than she may ever realize, i would have died for, stood beside her in sickness, and as i told her, even wiped her butt if she couldn't. the sad and flesh side to it is, as a pastor said, we're all capable of any sin in the wrong place. there is only one way to put it, she is by choice, ignoring, and sinning againist GOD. i do understand the devastation your feeling. my ex called me a religious finatic, it was GODS will, and satan had nothing to do with it. if being on fire for the lord is being a finatic, i'm guilty as charged. that comment floored me, but a friend of mine reminded me of christ words of how if people hate him, don't be surprised when they also hate those of us that follow him. joe GODS holy spirt will never leave her alone,if we are not living in his will, and lay our heads down at night, we hear him speaking to us and can't escape his voice, my ex still has no peace after 5 years. your wife does have her free will, and he will not go around it, but as with us all he still loves her and will continue to softly and gently call her back into his fold. she may not see it right now, but her relationship with him is more important than yours and hers. continue to pray for her. i had a friend of mine, he was comtiplating a divorce and leaving his wife and children for another woman, he came home one night and told his dad, the next morning he awoke to see his dad kneeing at his bedside, he had been praying for him all night, on a drive that day GOD spoke to him, he went back to his family, later became a pastor, that's been around 45 years now. don't let satan destroy you GOD still has a plan for you. just as i did, but couldn't see it at the time, he has blessed me more than i could ever deserve. continue in his will, he takes care of his children.
Amen. Prayers continue.
NightHawk, Continued prayers for you and yours from here....
Later....Buzz
Joe,
There comes a time in such trials of the heart and relationship when you might need to stop blaming yourself and actually call a spade a spade. I think your last post where you see she is bringing bad onto herself is a step in that direction.
I admire and encourage you to continue to keep that love light burning and the door open, but remember to call a spade a spade...this is HER doing and choosing, not yours.
You can help nobody by enabling them. Love them where they are but love yourself as well. Love yourself enough to know when you need to change and when it's another's problem that interfers.
You sound stronger like a light is coming on. Good! Love like there is no tomorrow, but dance like nobody's watching!
Keep the Son in your eyes! He and we love you!
Prayers still going out for you. Remember, satan trembles when the weakest christian prays.
Prayers continue for you.
Our sermon Sunday was that we should love the way God loves us. Even the hardest person you can think of to love. Sometimes that is others and sometimes that is our self. It isn't easy but God sets a good example. Continued prayers for you!
Keeping the Faith
Magnus
NightHawk:
I continue to pray for you and yours. Remember that God's love for you is never ending. :pray:
It is apparent, from the unconditional positive regard and love, concern, and care shown here that God is present on this forum.
This is my first time in the Prayers/Concerns forum, and I'm immensely moved by the support and encouragement brought to bear.
Joe, I have nothing to say that hasn't been already been given to you- much more eloquently and "real" than I can myself. However, please know that I am adding you to my prayers, and I'm confident that the grace, peace and comfort of God will be manifested to you in ways only He is currently aware of.
Blessings to you and yours from Oregon!!!
Jeff